Wearing a Black Wedding Dress

LifeIsRocqi
Feb 17
3 min read

Updated: Jul 4

(written on 8/26/2024)

Marriage Moment

My wedding. I put a lot of meaning into this day.

My wedding honored my commitment to myself because Black is Beautiful and I used this defining moment to count the ways.

Black wedding dress. At 16, I recognized the negative associations with the color black and the positive associations with the color white and decided then to wear black at my wedding and white at my funeral (and that was before I was even exposed to the actual tradition of wearing white with ancestral/spiritual practices). I actually understood it by 9th grade when I did an oral presentation on the doll test of the 1950s and the replicated test in 2006 which had the same results. My sweet 16 had the theme of Black is beautiful where all the guests had to wear black. I also wrote a poem at that age called "What is Beauty?" as I questioned the concepts that we had been indoctrinated with.
Cowrie shell headpiece and bracelet. Do you know the history and meaning behind cowrie shells?
Ankara necklace and earrings
Black and Gold was our theme to honor our excellence.
Continent of Africa armband
My husband wore a Senegalese kaftan
My husband wore glass beads from the Krobo people of Ghana
Our Jumping Broom was wrapped in Kente with cowrie shell accents
We married on Guyana's Emancipation Day to honor my husband's heritage
I wore earrings of the country of Guyana to show my dedication to teaching our children about their heritage.
We had Guyanese Black Cake at our reception
We had Sweet Potato Pie with the continent of Africa as a crust on top at our reception
I read my poetry at our reception. The poem I had written as a teenager and a poem I had written for my husband
My husband serenaded me with his saxophone and guitar to Queen Tings by Masego and I do by Rotimi respectively. The artistry that is our spirit had to be honored.
We had a Libation Ceremony at our reception.

Bonus: And of course, the Black line dances!

Oh and I forgot. At some point along my now 13 year natural hair journey, I decided I'd have all my own natural hair for my wedding. No fake hair and no straight hair. So I got to wear my locs on my wedding day (and after, a Mother Earth maternity shoot . I'm now back to my curls)

My husband said I created the Wedding of his Dreams that he didn't even know he wanted (he was for the Courthouse lol)

And I got to have a celebration of our Black Love and stay true to my Revolutionary Heart.

Our vow renewal can be to my romantic heart with the white wedding dress.

We are celebrating 6 years of committed life partnership

(written on 6/20/2021)

The revolutionary in me wants a black wedding dress. #blackisbeautiful

The hopeless romantic/Disney princess in me wants a white wedding dress.

I'm also open to blush or some lighter colors.

But it looks like I'll be having multiple celebrations (either with my current life partner or future life partner). #polyamorous

So yayy I can get it all lol.

Please note there WILL be Afrocentric accessories no matter the dress. You already know my celebrations bout to be Black AF!!

and definitely will be jumping the broom