(written 12/5/2018)
When I say #HappinessTakesWork and I had to work my fuckin ass off this year...I'm not lying.
My goals for this year:
Deconstruct and unlearn the concept of therapy from the Eurocentric education I received and become more confident in being a Black therapist
Go back to therapy to work on my negative thinking, social anxiety, abandonment and rejection issues
Build friendships and create a tribe
Get my podcast on my platforms and do LIVE shows It's Soul Real
Work on my first book of poetry
The steps I had to take to accomplish these goals:
(Deconstruct and unlearn the concept of therapy from the Eurocentric education I received and become more confident in being a Black therapist)
Attend Black Psychology workshops, Decolonizing the Psyche and trauma seminars, Black and Health conferences.
Read Dr. Joy DeGruy's Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome
Use storytelling with my clients
Be my authentic self with my clients
Acknowledge that limited self-disclosure is not taking into account Black culture.
Listen to podcasts on Black Mental Health
(Go back to therapy to work on my negative thinking, social anxiety, abandonment and rejection issues)
Attend weekly therapy bringing a journal with me for processing and reflections
Challenge my negative thoughts and learn new perspectives
Journal constantly. Always processing my thoughts and my feelings and seeing if they are true or not as they are not always factual
Join FB discussion groups to learn different perspectives
Accept being alone, find happiness while being alone and going back to doing things I enjoyed alone
Start attending events by myself
Understand my limits and what causes significant distress
Change the narrative I had in my head based on limited experiences.
Find the reason in everything that happens.
(Build friendships and create a tribe)
Use Bumble app to make friends
Go to Black women events to make friends
Let go of the expectation to make friends and follow the connections I make
Text new friends often
Listen
(Get my podcast on my platforms and do LIVE shows)
Continuous posts on social media with hashtags to draw people in
Live shows at 11am PST. Release the podcast out at 1pm PST
Sign up with Anchor.FMÂ and download old episodes (this took hours)
Sign up with iTunes using Podcast Connect (took an hour)
Create RSS Feed (first research wth that was) on Soundcloud then download all old episodes to rereleased now including RSS feed to show on new platforms
It'sSoulReal is now available on 11 different platforms
Work on my first book of poetry
Gather my writing (after not having access to it for two years. Literally the miracles within the universe)
Put poems into chapters
Edit poems without changing my voice
Write Acknowledgments
Research publishing options
Create Table of Contents
Find editor and go over chapters with them then make edits
Currently working on how to publish
Lessons:
Focus on the steps within the journey instead of focusing on the goal. Be present in your actions.
You gotta work your ass off for the things you want. This isn't a game. This is your life.